samantha rose johnson

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things i journaled in 2020

things i’ve said in the last year (inspired by Shanice Ariel):

January:

  • i am so grateful and ready

  • it’s good for me to have this time to myself

  • lessons of boundaries - it seems like a big part of adulthood is making space to truly cultivate and craft your life

  • i am learning more of what i need in my life and in my relationships

February:

  • i’m just going through the motions

  • i’m struggling to hear myself even though i feel like i’m in constant communication with myself

  • i’m so over everything i’m doing

  • i am capable of handling everything that comes my way

  • i’m too big for the pot i am in

March:

  • we are always worthy of BEing

  • i had to finally say it

  • i’m trying to see this as an opportunity

  • everything feels so trivial

  • human life is fun and we are all afraid to lose it but we know it can and should be better, more loving, more kind, more compassionate

April

  • we are the keepers of earth and we are meant to take care of her

  • i have been craving peace and quiet and stillness

  • i don’t know how i could ever go back to that hustle; i want to hustle for ME now

  • i am allowing myself to slow down

  • i was over-giving a LOT, and i’m not going to anymore

  • thank you for bringing this bundle of love and joy and adventure into my life

May

  • but there’s one more thing i’m missing

  • i am doing my best

  • i’m just really tired of this taking up so much energy

  • i am paying the price of my own bad habits

  • i don’t think i’ve been this exhausted and overwhelmed in quite some time

  • i feel on edge

June

  • i’m done answering to other people

  • i have to protect my peace

  • i am grateful, even when i’m angry and annoyed

  • i just burst into tears.. it was like gratitude and relief and happiness all at the same time

  • sometimes the way people seem to perceive you is such a weird thing to grapple with

  • i feel triggered when i’m misunderstood

  • i don’t like the idea of people making up their minds about me when they don’t truly know me

July

  • let me never forget my worth or what i have to offer

  • the little nudges i receive are part of the big nudges

  • talking to walls is one of my least favorite things

  • why do i shoulder all of that responsibility?


2022 note: I forgot about this and never came back to it, which, considering how life turned in August of 2020, I’d say makes sense. I’d say I’ll go back and complete the year, but it doesn’t matter. Just going to publish this as it is.

Photo by pure julia on Unsplash